2 Average Chicago Sports Fans talking Sox

Ladies and Gentlemen. Your 2008 Chicago White Sox!

Orton going long to.... Orton

So I'm fabreezing over the top WR's rankings for this upcoming draft and I see Greg Orton out there from Purdue. Would there be a better combination out there than an Orton to Orton combo? Especially since they are from the same college that's produced about 4 NFL players.

Iraqi's and Seahawks, match made in heaven

Here we see an Iraqi sporting a 2000 Seahawks football shirt. I take it they didn't win anything that year. Perhaps I should just stop wearing jersey's and sport that years football team.

2008 Bears football. . . . um. . . good enough (print)!

'uh, could ya lean in a bit more chad...great thanks!'

the jets team was obviously thrilled to be in the presence of elmo, just like every other 1 year old. only problem is that bill belichick beat the snot out of the jets later that week on sept. 9, 2007 by a score of 38-14. but the jets have a more well rounded resume ya see.

obviously a conspiracy

the 'Da Bears' sign has a couple different shadows, but inside the shuttle, there should only be one, the sun. the 'astronauts' somehow got their signals crossed and couldn't remember whether they were home or away. hence we have a dude that looks like a sailor in the background. also, bears fans don't go to space. nice try NASA!

status at 11:21am EST

Kerry "my helmet is so low I can't see" Collins gets the nod

Forgive me. I know in our manifesto we said we wouldn't write about breaking sports news. But I couldn't resist. Is there anyone else in the history of the NFL who has worn his or her helmet below eye level?

GOOD SEASON CUBS! WE'LL GET EM NEXT YEAR

Gettin ready for the season

so...

How Many Seconds Will Mike Brown Last This Year?

Let's be honest, call a spade a spade, shoot from the hip, whatever other cliché phrase can be used for telling it like it is. Fan favorite Mike Brown has been injured each of the last 45 seasons, each year earlier in the season than the previous one. So based on the Numbers Guy's calculations, he's now down to about 18-22 seconds of PT (short for playing time, not as in peter tom willis) this year. His injuries have strangely been plotted on a line graph and the result is parabolic in relation to the length of the season that passes before he gets injured. So that's why this season he may only last 18-22 seconds. I love Mike Brown to death and hope that the Numbers Guy's calculations are off...but just wanted to prep the fans.

Passionately yours,
the Numbers Guy